It's definitely been forever since I updated because as many of you know, I've been very occupied. So for my birthday this year I’ve decided to update my blog and share my story in hopes that it could spread positivity, love and happiness with people out there and that is The Story of Yusuf- Part 1, Part 2 & Part 3 💖
I know many who thinks I’m the happiest person who has it all, but like any other human being I also have my ups and downs and good times and bad times y’alls! We're all just the same and that is why I feel like sharing this post today as I celebrate my best birthday as a family of 3 this year, Alhamdulillah.
So the story of Yusuf began 5 years ago when Aiman and I got married. We both love kids and we know that one day we wanted children of our own but in that first year, we wanted to travel first and agreed let’s have kids after. What we did not know was how difficult it was for me to conceive and carry.
Done with fun and travels, in 2016 I got pregnant and we were elated! Unfortunately 5/6 weeks in, I miscarried and the experience was terrible. I bled twice before being rushed to A&E only to be told by the doctor to get admitted first because the Gynae at that time wasn’t available on call as she was away. I remembered clearly that I was crying and begging the Emergency Doctor then to call the gynae or any gynae because I could feel that I may lose the baby with the amount of bleeding I had and couldn’t afford to wait a day and get admitted. Probably looked like a wreck at A&E at that time as I couldn’t handle my tears!
True enough, we lost the baby about a week after and had to go through what I thought was the most painful (at that time) contraction before it naturally exited on it’s own whilst I was showering.
For a while, I was lost because I didn’t know how to feel about a miscarriage. Although it was only 6 weeks, I wanted so badly to keep the baby and everything people said to me wasn’t comforting. Let's be honest, no amount of "it's ok" or "Don't stress, maybe it's not your time" would do any good. Was on leave from work for awhile to recover and went back with only my boss knowing about it because I wasn’t ready for people to know my story and why I was on leave. So I went back to work with my normal smile and life went on as usual after - only that when I got home, there are times when I’d breakdown so so badly, only Aiman would see.
Was I devastated? I was, but my hope wasn't broken because we know our minds that it has only been a year since we got married, so let's just keep on being positive and keep on trying whilst at the same time continue to go on our travels, build our F&B venture and have fun! 🤗
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