Sayang, I went in today in the morning and you were half awake half asleep... but your hands. That right hand of yours is so strong! You keep picking up your hand towards your face and I kept having to grab your hand to stop you from moving it. You keep wanting to pull those wires and tubes out. Sigh...It's painful, I know. Tapi you kena sabar yang. Sikit je lagi. You looked so exhausted, like you've been fighting all the way and even the doctors said you were progressing very well.
I was happy for a moment because you know what? You were on Ventimask 3 litres!!! and your GCS is 10!!! Well doneeeeeee!!! Those are just such excellent counts and numbers :) until the Doctor spilled out the beans saying that they discovered a new infection in your right lung. Sigh...My heart skipped a bit, probably two. I tried to digest the pain you're going through, one after another. Doctor showed Melisa your chest X-Ray. There's some haziness at your right lower zone of the lung. and then to top that up, I had to digest even further extra information about you having a fever. Your temperature has gone up a bit, it was bout 38 or so, hence the Doctors have stepped up your antibiotics. They are also doing physio for you twice a day because your left side seems weaker than your right.
But you know what you did today? When we mentioned that your left hand is weak in front of you, you actually picked up your right hand, slowly with full effort pulled it and placed it on your left arm and picked up your left arm, like as if telling us that "No, my left hand is fine! and I am trying". We know you are trying and fighting very hard too Zwan, and we were really very proud of you. Though once, when I was reading the Syifa' verses for you, I didn't realized that you have pulled up your right hand halfway, and before I could pull it down, you got to the wire... and you managed to grab hold of it and pulled it out. That was scary and I can just stare before panicking because I didn't know what tube did you pull! So I quickly ran to the Doctor on call and told him, and he rushed to your place and put it back on. Phew...
You were shivering sayang...coz I think you were cold sebab you're demam. Sigh... Sakitnye just tengok you battling that on your own. I felt so crappy and helpless. But even then, you really did know how to make me laugh tau. hehe...As I watched you battle, you open your mouth SO WIDE, uttered "haaa", before you started yawning and then went back to sleep! hahaha!!! Omg, that was soooo comel k, and funny too at the same time. You sure did make me laugh there. Even Mummy pointed out that "That is so Azwan.". haha! But after that, you continued being a bit rough with me, and pushed my hands away when I tried to stop you from reaching to those tubes and wires. I'm so so sorry I had to pull your hands away so much today. It's not that I'm not allowing you to, but it's for your safety and speedy recovery yang. I did tap your hand when you were being "Naughty" nak tarik those wires and salawat banyak banyak as I pulled your hands away. hehe...but that's a good sign that you can feel, Alhamdulillah.
Sayang, your GCS is doing so well with your motor being a perfect 6 counts! How well is that? Excellent! Keep on fighting k? Slowly but surely these tough times will pass, InsyaAllah. Your RR was a bit high but doctor said with your strength up to 25 count is still ok and I saw that your SpO2 was excellent too!! You're on 3 litre now and we're all well proud of you. Doctors will continue monitoring your infected lungs and at the same time let you have some rest by giving you oral sedation round the clock, 4 times a day. Plus, monitoring that haematoma on your left side of the brain. Sayang, for everything that's happening and taking place one after another, ade hikmahnye, so you keep on being the strong Azu you are k as Doctor said that you making a much faster recovery than expected. MasyaAllah, only God knows how thankful we are to hear that.
Azam and Nury came by to see you too today...and I felt so sad when they cried after seeing you :( You keep on being the strong fighter you are k, InsyaAllah these times will pass faster than we realize it. I love you for being so so so sooo strong! You're doing so well dear! Very well :)
I'm praying for a better tomorrow, InsyaAllah.
"Ya Allah, please let Azwan be strong enough to fight this new infection in his right lung, calm him down so they don't have to give him oral sedation round the clock. Help him regain power in his left side of the body, be able to open his eyes to focus & help him speak. Let our faith in You keep us strong and give me strength through this trying time.Amin. Come on Azwan, you're a strong fighter! I love you sayang"
2 comments:
Hi Alia, I'm just your blog follower. Hope your cousin gets better, I've been reading your new entries with the hope that your cousin gets better and better. I am a med student and I must say, you really understood what the doctors were telling you! Insyallah soon Azwan's GCS will reach 15! May Allah be with you and your family.
Thank you so much Aniah for your positive hopes. InsyaAllah, being the strong boy he is, he will fight to make it reach 15 though his verbal was still 1 as of yesterday.
Nonetheless, we're very thankful for his GCS was 3 last week and now it's 10. Out of the severe range of 3-8 and a perfect motor count. He's strong.
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