I try to smile so the hurt won't show

Adoi...An amazing day didn't end too well now did it? Ok la, I need to create motivation for myself to look positively into things from here now.

What if I'm not allowed to be there, but another family member is and has even purchased and will be there in the next one, two months or so? Will the disease fade away by then?

What if I'm not allowed to be there but I am allowed to be at one of the only two hospitals that does the H1N1 screening? I can be at the highest risk place EVERYDAY without your worries but not at a place that has been rumoured much about it? Hmmm

I managed to win one, lose one. But when I lose to the leader of the troop, that means I've lost completely. A draw signals a lost. Oh well.

I just couldn't hold back when she couldn't hold back too and when she dropped it and told me that "when you start work, it's gonna be damn hard for you". How does she know? Coz her other bestie, already in CIMB said "It's hard to even get a day off" and "it's CIMB's policy that they ban their staffs from going there". Once I'm a staff, I shall adhere to that policy and there goes my opportunity. The last opening I have this time. After this, they shan't worry about me even asking I guess, as I can't even get CIMB to approve this once I'm labeled as 'CIMB's Associate'

Goodbye opportunity. Goodbye motivation. Goodbye advanced plans and her ticket for me to travel. Yup a whole ticket. ON HER. Thank you for your thoughts and for holding up the imaginary plans with me for the past 5 months. It WAS beautiful indeed

As I talk to her now, she's trying to hold up too as much as I am. Oh well.

I guess they know what's best for me, InsyaAllah. And as I am gearing up for work soon, I would need a lot of blessings from them. So I shall wash away the hurt and move on.

Oh well, let's occupy myself now with some YCM paper work and forget about last year, when I got to go and it motivated me to excel in my final year of University, which I ended up doing. I achieved my goal in that degree results I targeted for myself to obtain. Hello a bundle of work. I'm not in the mood

Ps : I'm on gchat too yang. I'll see you there

Ps : Thanks yang for going through that moment with me tonight. As I speak to you at this current moment in time and cannot seem to go to sleep, I love you Shura Shukor!

So what was I working on again? Sponsorship.... Speakers... Companies.

Sign,

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